Alone with my thoughts

Well it has been a few weeks since I have written and now the date surgery date is just around the corner (9-30-08). At this point in the process all the pre testing is over, the insurance companies satisfied that it is a necessary procedure and I am now alone with my thoughts. I am not alone in the literal sense for I have been blessed with an overwhelming out pouring of support from friends and family and I have the greatest support from my bride anyone could ask for. Alone with my thoughts is I now have nothing more before the surgery to offer other than what is on my mind at this moment.

I have over the past several months during this pre-operative journey been in contact with many who have gone this path before me with great courage and have gone head to head with Parkinson’s and say I will not let PD win! So what makes me different than these others, why have I received this overwhelming support? From my point of view I only differ in that I have chosen to share my journey in a more public manner. Additionally I was honored to be asked to share my story by being part of a documentary feature film that is being produced to raise funds and awareness for Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s.

I want to mention some people who have given me the courage to face this procedure by sharing their stories with me of both the good and the not so good things they experienced with having the DBS surgery. I would like to publicly thank James, Gary, Mike, Gaylund and Cindy for sharing their stories and giving me the strength and inspiration to move forward with my decision to have DBS. These folks have faced this procedure and are doing great; they also individually inspire me by just having moved on after DBS and are still doing great things for the PD community.

I have been asked almost on a daily basis if I am nervous about the surgery and most people are surprised by my answer of no. It may be hard for some people but as I have told those that have asked, I am confident in what I am doing why I am doing it and who is doing it. I have made some poor decisions in my life and some have carried heavy consequences. Then I have made many choices that have enhanced my life in ways I could have never imagined. As this day approaches I have prepared myself to accept whatever outcome I have, I am confident I will look back months from now and be satisfied with the relief of symptoms the DBS provides. I also understand as well as I ask anyone who reads this to understand that THIS IS NOT A CURE! This procedure is a means of relief of the symptoms and the Parkinson’s disease will continue to progress even though the outward symptoms may not be as obvious. But I am also hopeful that with the efforts of Focus on a Cure and all the other organizations that are working toward finding a cure by the time the progression of my PD has surpassed the benefits of the DBS there will be a cure available.

I will probably post one more blog before Tuesday but I hope this blog has helped even one person have the courage to do whatever is necessary to take control over PD or what ever physical demon they face then it was worth it. I know it has helped me by being able to express and share my experience to this point and I look forward to blogging for years to come about the great strides we have made toward a cure.

Stay Focused,
Ken